This is essentially a playoff game – if the Cowboys lose, they will have a hard time making the tournament. With that amount of importance, this game deserves the insight and snark of this self-indulgent blogger.
Pregame – Ugh. It’s a CBS game. I’m going to be spared to death by Phil Sims and that awful music they play in and out of breaks.
Q1 14:51 : It’s nice to see Felix back.
Q1 12:58: Today’s first false start brought to you by Bergen County native Miles Austen.
Q1 12:12 : Back to back penalties push Dallas back to their own territory. It’s good to see they have decided to not to change their ways for an important game.
Q1 10:51 : Alert the media. Roy Williams makes an important catch.
Q1 8:45 : Looking at the incompletion to Phillips, I think Roy ran the wrong route and brought his defender into the middle of the endzone breaking up the play. How’s that for sports analysis?? Pow Pow!
Q1 8:40 : FG Dallas (Dallas 3 – San Diego 0). Romo holding already pays dividends. But seriously, if Folk misses that he gets cut instantly.
Q1 8:00 : SD Center Scott Mruczkowski looks like he might be a special needs kid.
Q1 6:10 : Terrance Newman is still looking for his jock.
Q1 5:10 : Sensabaugh, dude, you were in position. Make the interception.
Q1 4:30 : TD San Diego (San Diego 7 – Dallas 3). After the first two plays were for a loss on this drive, the Dallas D let’s the Chargers slice through them like a hot knife through a pathetic defense.
Q1 2:58 : Nice three-and-out Cowboys. What exactly is the point of Roy’s route that was four yards short of the first down? It’s not like he ever breaks tackles and picks up a bunch of YACs like Miles does.
Q1 1:04 : Great coverage by Jenkins, but a better catch from Jackson. Yet another big play given up by the Dallas D.
End of First Quarter – San Diego Super Chargers 7 Dallas Cowboys 3
Q2 14:22 : Wade Phillips makes a barking seal hand gesture which I guess means more pie please.
Q2 13:49 : More great coverage by Jenkins. The ball was well place but slightly out of bounds.
Q2 10:18: FG San Diego (SD 10 – Dallas 3) Not looking good. Selling all Dallas Playoff futures. But if Dallas O can do anything on the next drive…. Who am i kidding???
Q2 9:30 Felix! That’s a good start. Two good runs by Jones.
Q2 8:40 Why are we reviewing Romo’s sack from 40 minutes ago? Oh, to show us CBS’ expensive computer graphic play-pretty.
Q2 6:57 Does Williams ever not look for a flag whenever he doesn’t make a catch, which is often.
Q2 2:30 Thought they needed to go for it. But MB3 couldn’t get that last yard three times in a row. Nice drive, though. It’ll be something nice to look at during week one of the playoffs and the Cowboys are all sitting home. Why do I feel like I’m about to see a 99 yard touchdown drive?
Q2 1:46 WHOOP. TNew with INT! Plenty of time left.
Q2 0:42 Folk FG no good. Can anyone else hold? But seriously, can anyone else kick?
Q2 0:25 Jenkins with more great coverage. Keep throwing to him Phil. Your efforts will be rewarded in a pick-six.
Q2 0:18 Bowen with the much needed sack. SD is now way out of FG range and timeouts.
Q2 0:13 Jenkins is so good he prevents receptions by his own teammates.
End of First Half – SD 10 Dal 3 – After a shaky start the Dallas D keeps SD to only 10 points. But the Dallas O continues to the disturbing trending of accumulating yardage but few points.
Random Halftime Thoughts
- Can someone explain to me the difference between CSI, NCSI and Criminal Minds?
- Bits of my brain have started to ooz out of my ears from having to listen to the generic, often incorrect analysis of Phil Sims.
- Slouching Towards Idiocracy – A live event is shown in 3D. Isn’t reality in 3D? And you don’t need the stupid glasses; just some nice hipster doofus frames like mine.
- I’m not the target audience for much of the advertizing. Crime procedurals and American yellow beer are not exactly staples of my existence.
Q3 11:36 Cowboys have been lining up with Ware on one side then swapping OLBs. The confusion finally almost resulted in a sack.
Q3 10:40 96 yards to a tie?
Q3 9:41 Nope. But the first sighting of the Barbie Bird on the punt.
Q3 8:04 Alan Ball saves a touchdown. Further greatest from the Six Feet Under creator.
Q3 7:49 Barbie Carpenter makes a tackle in front of the 1st down line.
Q3 7:10 99 yards to a tie? Dallas is not winning this war of field position.
Q3 5:55 Ugh. A promo for my sports kryptonite – college basketball.
Q3 4:03 First long completion of the day to Austen.
Q3 3:35 Why run wide with MB3?
Q3 2:23 It’s Miles Austen time!
Q3 1:41 Roy Williams is apparently reading this live blog and gets a shit tonne of YACs on this play.
Q3 0:55 MB3 to the 1. I’ve seen this movie before.
Q3 0:02 Touchdown Miles Austen!!!! Dal 10 SD 10. Dallas Cowboys now rated a slight buy.
End of Third Quarter Dal 10 SD 10. It’s a ballgame!!!!
Q4 14:09 : Ugh. They can’t let rivers have that much time. Great stuff on LT on the first down play.
Q4 12:05 : Dang. Sproles is dragging multiple Cowboys for his 3 yard gains.
Q4 11:28 : Ware’s down. Not good. Cowboys now rated a weak sell.
Q4 11:28 : Oh shit, they’re bringing out the cart. Since I was pre-med in college I\’m diagnosing this as cervical cancer.
Q4 10:56 : TD San Diego (SD 17 Dal 10) Way to rally around your fallen teammate Dallas. You were able to give up 53 yards in only 32 seconds. Way to nut up.
Q4 10:42 : How does Witten get so open down field?
Q4 10:15 : Jones almost breaks Romo’s ankle with his fumble recovery.
Q4 9:23 : Well that drive sucked. After the Witten catch, we’re treated to a Jones fumble, an almost interception and a throw to Roy Williams aka the Drive Killer. But to be fair to Roy, he was single covered. Did Dallas hang a Mission Accomplished banner after their TD? Both the D and O looked like they thought the game was over and Superbowl rings would be handed out at the conclusion of the game.
Q4 7:51 I got a giggle from the spell checker that suggested that Superbowl should have been Superb owl. In what context has that phrase ever been used? Maybe in describing former Vikings QB Tommy Krammer?
Q4 4:15 Well, that’s just about it. LT with the first down. Unless Dallas traded Folk to SD at halftime, the Chargers are in FG range with little resistance from the Dallas D.
Q4 2:00 Two minute warning. I’ve mentally checked out of this game as well by looking at pictures on Facebook. I get the feeling the defense has done much the same. All you need to do is have a season saving hold. But the Chargers nickel and dime you down the field running precious minutes off the clock.
Q4 1:56 FG San Diego (SD 20 Dal 10)
Q4 1:44 What was that? Williams was walking out of bounds.
Q4 1:36 To Williams credit, that was good work on the slant.
Q4 0:07 Enough time for two scores?
Q4 0:02 TD Dallas (SD 20 Dal 17) Too little too late. Not enough time to recover an onside kick.
End Of Game (SD 20 Dal 17)
Eagles have to win tonight. With a game left against Philly, Dallas can still win the division with a win against them later.